Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Tuition envelope
記: The gratitude which came up in my mind was probably what motivates me to write and post this story. Many thanks to all my teachers in my dance, study, and life.
Since I was little, I practiced dance at a local dance studio, Bi-Liang Dance Studio. There I met my mentors, Teacher Huang Bi-Liang and others, the greatest dance teachers in the world. I learned so much, much more than dance techniques. I understood what are ethics, responsibilities, and respectfulness, not only for myself, but also for every teacher.
Every month, each pupil had to pay the tuition, which was supposed to be presented in an envelope. It could be either the child or the parents who offered it to the dance teacher. On the envelope, we wrote:
Thank you for your teaching. Name. Tuition for this month.
In my memories, my father gathered the amount of tuition and gave it to me to place in the envelope. Then I wrote these words by myself.
Besides dance, our teachers persistently encouraged us to study hard as much as we could. We brought the assignments from school along with us to the dance studio. We used the time before classes or between rehearsals to do our homework. Our teachers even supervised our writing both Chinese and English characters correctly and decently. Since I was little, I have always admired my big sister's beautiful handwriting so much; I thought that symbolized wisdom and good traits of a person. She was my model, and I practiced my handwriting assiduously; and I had fun.
One time I wrote my name on my tuition envelope. I was proud of myself because I'd been practicing it for a while. I thought my handwriting was dashing and refined; sometimes it looked like it's dancing. My teacher looked at the envelop and said, "You are just beginning to practice handwriting, do it attentively and neatly, don't be careless!" So I erased the words and rewrote them. Ever after, I wanted to write my name (and other people's name) correctly and honestly. I understood one was not supposed to treat people or anything without care.
I still remember the feeling as I was writing those words, word by word mindfulnessly. I know I should respect teachers, myself, and take responsibility for myself.
The money in the envelope is very essential. It can help to balance the studio's budget; it can be used to hire better teachers. But most important, to put tuition in such an envelope teaches our children the humility and seriousness in learning, and the gratitude we should always have to our parents and teachers. The spirit and discipline of our dance studio are still in my mind and my body. The tuition hasn't increased for 20 years. I wonder if "education" can actually be weighed by money. What my dance teachers have taught me is way more than what the tuition my parents have paid can buy.
記: The money I pay for two credits here at Lesley U is enough for me to study in the graduate school of the TNUA for a semester; and for completing a master I have to take 60 credits. It could be cultural differences. Students call their teachers by their first names, showing no respect for their learning or experience. However, I don't feel that students nowadays have better attitudes in learning, or hold more thankfulness toward or more treasure teachers' teaching.
My first dance teacher said: In a full score of 100, there should be 50 from the teacher, and 50 from the student!
I think it's possible that this generation cannot understand the meaning of "Thank you for your teaching." Or, perhaps the meaning of it has changed; now it can be looked as a flattery or something that deserves no attention. :::: My parents SHOULD be paying the tuition for me to go to school; my teachers got my money, so they SHOULD guarantee that I can go to college; I want to travel abroad, study abroad, so somebody SHOULD be responsible to all the expense for me. :::: ridiculous SHOULD.
When I was eleven or twelve, every time I handed the tuition envelope to my dance teacher, "Thank you, teacher" was not only from my mouth, but also from my heart.
My teachers, thank you so much for your teaching.
Since I was little, I practiced dance at a local dance studio, Bi-Liang Dance Studio. There I met my mentors, Teacher Huang Bi-Liang and others, the greatest dance teachers in the world. I learned so much, much more than dance techniques. I understood what are ethics, responsibilities, and respectfulness, not only for myself, but also for every teacher.
Every month, each pupil had to pay the tuition, which was supposed to be presented in an envelope. It could be either the child or the parents who offered it to the dance teacher. On the envelope, we wrote:
Thank you for your teaching. Name. Tuition for this month.
In my memories, my father gathered the amount of tuition and gave it to me to place in the envelope. Then I wrote these words by myself.
Besides dance, our teachers persistently encouraged us to study hard as much as we could. We brought the assignments from school along with us to the dance studio. We used the time before classes or between rehearsals to do our homework. Our teachers even supervised our writing both Chinese and English characters correctly and decently. Since I was little, I have always admired my big sister's beautiful handwriting so much; I thought that symbolized wisdom and good traits of a person. She was my model, and I practiced my handwriting assiduously; and I had fun.
One time I wrote my name on my tuition envelope. I was proud of myself because I'd been practicing it for a while. I thought my handwriting was dashing and refined; sometimes it looked like it's dancing. My teacher looked at the envelop and said, "You are just beginning to practice handwriting, do it attentively and neatly, don't be careless!" So I erased the words and rewrote them. Ever after, I wanted to write my name (and other people's name) correctly and honestly. I understood one was not supposed to treat people or anything without care.
I still remember the feeling as I was writing those words, word by word mindfulnessly. I know I should respect teachers, myself, and take responsibility for myself.
The money in the envelope is very essential. It can help to balance the studio's budget; it can be used to hire better teachers. But most important, to put tuition in such an envelope teaches our children the humility and seriousness in learning, and the gratitude we should always have to our parents and teachers. The spirit and discipline of our dance studio are still in my mind and my body. The tuition hasn't increased for 20 years. I wonder if "education" can actually be weighed by money. What my dance teachers have taught me is way more than what the tuition my parents have paid can buy.
記: The money I pay for two credits here at Lesley U is enough for me to study in the graduate school of the TNUA for a semester; and for completing a master I have to take 60 credits. It could be cultural differences. Students call their teachers by their first names, showing no respect for their learning or experience. However, I don't feel that students nowadays have better attitudes in learning, or hold more thankfulness toward or more treasure teachers' teaching.
My first dance teacher said: In a full score of 100, there should be 50 from the teacher, and 50 from the student!
I think it's possible that this generation cannot understand the meaning of "Thank you for your teaching." Or, perhaps the meaning of it has changed; now it can be looked as a flattery or something that deserves no attention. :::: My parents SHOULD be paying the tuition for me to go to school; my teachers got my money, so they SHOULD guarantee that I can go to college; I want to travel abroad, study abroad, so somebody SHOULD be responsible to all the expense for me. :::: ridiculous SHOULD.
When I was eleven or twelve, every time I handed the tuition envelope to my dance teacher, "Thank you, teacher" was not only from my mouth, but also from my heart.
My teachers, thank you so much for your teaching.
# posted by Chao=Sabiy : 10:30 PM
Sunday, April 27, 2008
學費袋
note: 將這篇寫出來，大概因為昨天完成在此的最後一份報告，鬆口氣的同時，心中有無限感謝。謝謝一路上支持、幫助我的人，我舞蹈、生活和學業上的老師們。
由小時學舞、練舞的舞蹈社—碧亮舞蹈班 (板橋)—老師們身上，我學到好多。諸多學習中，有個我想是根深蒂固在我身體裏的觀念，有形無形地教我尊師重道。每個月繳交學費，無論是透過父母或小孩子自己交給老師，費用都要放入一個信封，封面要寫上「謝謝老師的指導，某某某，某月份學費」。印象中，在我懂事時，父親幫我湊足學費，讓我放入信封，然後這幾個字就是我自己寫的。
舞蹈以外，老師無時不刻鼓勵我們要用心用功唸書，學校作業我們總是一起帶到舞蹈社，練舞、排舞之餘就可以做功課；老師還親自督促我們練字，包括中文和英文字母。我從小欽羨我大姊字寫得好漂亮，覺得那是「有智慧和氣質」的象徵，所以我也學她勤練，邊練邊玩。
有一次我寫自己的名字在信封上，以為應該「練」得不錯了，所以字寫得很瀟灑，有的像在飛舞。我的老師看了說，才剛開始學字不要亂來，要工整！於是我將幾個字擦掉重寫，一筆一劃仔細、不馬乎，一番檢視後才敢再交給老師。從此以後我更知道寫字要用心、待人處事不要隨便。
我還記得用心用意寫那幾個字的感覺。尊重老師，尊重自己，對自己負責。
信封袋裏的金錢真的重要，重要在平衡教室的瑣碎開支、聘請好的老師 (我們的老師都是由舞蹈社長大的學生!)；但更重要的，是在告訴孩子不要隨便，要認真學習，要悉心謙遜的接受指導，要知道感謝老師及父母。舞蹈社的精神與紀律仍在，學費二十年沒漲過。我想，「教育」真的能以金錢衡量？我的老師教我的，遠遠超越那些學費可以「買」得到的。
note: 在這裏唸書的兩個學分費，就夠我在北藝大研究所唸一個學期，而完成這裏的學業我需修滿六十學分！但我並不感覺這裡的學生／現在的學生之學習態度比較好，對老師的指導有比較多的珍惜和感謝。
我舞蹈的啟蒙老師說：老師五十分，學生五十分，加起來才有一百分！
說不定現在的孩子已不易體認「謝謝老師的指導」之意義，也說不定這句話如今意義已變，被一般人解讀是奉承、多此一舉？ :::: 我要讀書，爸媽理當要幫我付學費；收了學費，老師們理當要保證我可以上大學；我要出國玩、出國留學，有人理當要幫我出錢，一切都是應該的，有錢為證。何需尊重、努力，何需感謝？ :::: 應該的荒謬。
當時我十一、十二歲，每次雙手將信封袋教給老師，「謝謝老師」于口于心。
謝謝老師的指導。
由小時學舞、練舞的舞蹈社—碧亮舞蹈班 (板橋)—老師們身上，我學到好多。諸多學習中，有個我想是根深蒂固在我身體裏的觀念，有形無形地教我尊師重道。每個月繳交學費，無論是透過父母或小孩子自己交給老師，費用都要放入一個信封，封面要寫上「謝謝老師的指導，某某某，某月份學費」。印象中，在我懂事時，父親幫我湊足學費，讓我放入信封，然後這幾個字就是我自己寫的。
舞蹈以外，老師無時不刻鼓勵我們要用心用功唸書，學校作業我們總是一起帶到舞蹈社，練舞、排舞之餘就可以做功課；老師還親自督促我們練字，包括中文和英文字母。我從小欽羨我大姊字寫得好漂亮，覺得那是「有智慧和氣質」的象徵，所以我也學她勤練，邊練邊玩。
有一次我寫自己的名字在信封上，以為應該「練」得不錯了，所以字寫得很瀟灑，有的像在飛舞。我的老師看了說，才剛開始學字不要亂來，要工整！於是我將幾個字擦掉重寫，一筆一劃仔細、不馬乎，一番檢視後才敢再交給老師。從此以後我更知道寫字要用心、待人處事不要隨便。
我還記得用心用意寫那幾個字的感覺。尊重老師，尊重自己，對自己負責。
信封袋裏的金錢真的重要，重要在平衡教室的瑣碎開支、聘請好的老師 (我們的老師都是由舞蹈社長大的學生!)；但更重要的，是在告訴孩子不要隨便，要認真學習，要悉心謙遜的接受指導，要知道感謝老師及父母。舞蹈社的精神與紀律仍在，學費二十年沒漲過。我想，「教育」真的能以金錢衡量？我的老師教我的，遠遠超越那些學費可以「買」得到的。
note: 在這裏唸書的兩個學分費，就夠我在北藝大研究所唸一個學期，而完成這裏的學業我需修滿六十學分！但我並不感覺這裡的學生／現在的學生之學習態度比較好，對老師的指導有比較多的珍惜和感謝。
我舞蹈的啟蒙老師說：老師五十分，學生五十分，加起來才有一百分！
說不定現在的孩子已不易體認「謝謝老師的指導」之意義，也說不定這句話如今意義已變，被一般人解讀是奉承、多此一舉？ :::: 我要讀書，爸媽理當要幫我付學費；收了學費，老師們理當要保證我可以上大學；我要出國玩、出國留學，有人理當要幫我出錢，一切都是應該的，有錢為證。何需尊重、努力，何需感謝？ :::: 應該的荒謬。
當時我十一、十二歲，每次雙手將信封袋教給老師，「謝謝老師」于口于心。
謝謝老師的指導。
# posted by Chao=Sabiy : 3:55 PM
Thursday, April 24, 2008
要以文字寫舞真的不容易。記得以前，指導教授張中煖老師曾提醒我們，雖不易，但舞，該是要習舞者來寫；該是本身在舞、能親近自己身體、認知如何舞動及舞之本質與美、不斷在探索舞蹈的人來寫。如教育部海外留學獎學金裏的「舞蹈類」，好像應該多些真正習舞者去拿 (這點我讓老師失望了)。
至今我仍覺得寫舞很難，也可說是我為自己找藉口，但真正或曾經深入領域的人便能明白，舞蹈可如修行，必須謙卑、必須不屈撓於小苦大苦，必須思考。舞同人生，講的是過程，多少人能正視並享受過程而將結果輕描淡寫？ 對我來說，舞蹈的課題在此。細膩而浩瀚，一粒沙一個宇宙，怎麼寫？
舞，是人的內外融合找到一種原始真誠，其豐富內涵遠遠超過言語所能形容，遠遠超過觀者所見外表的光彩炫麗，遠遠。怎麼寫？
忽視真誠用身用心用意的人，怎能了解？
向來很少看臺灣舞蹈評論，大部分不是寫不好，大概是我生性就不愛「評論」，總覺得此類言語通常表現很主觀的客觀 (當然，沒有甚麼是真的客觀的)，也或許由於自己實在太沉潛於舞蹈藝術中，評論是我對不熟悉的團體或作品之初步了解、或想一窺流行動向時的媒介 (當然，已經很久沒這麼做…)。
臺灣真正寫舞的人不多，我認識的可以寫的人還沒寫，如我恩師, Flora; 另一位可將舞蹈寫出來的是許芳宜學姐。尚無機會拜讀她的書，但相信已經很多朋友知道、並已手中有書了。近日才發現芳宜學姐的 blog, 發現很多很多人發現她的書、她的人、她的舞，因她的努力與故事而深受鼓舞；不只是她的舞，她的文字也總是留露樸實、誠摯，不用華麗矯作的文字遊戲，她寫舞的文字有血肉、有汗水，有舞蹈諄諄醇醇盡致淋漓的過程。
昨天才發現學姐去年底寫的一篇 舞者 at http://www.wretch.cc/blog/fayi&article_id=9553013
如她說的，這個 list 還沒完呢!
# posted by Chao=Sabiy : 8:38 AM
Friday, April 18, 2008
The word duty indicates compulsion. The word responsibility indicates freedom.
─Maa Purnnananda
無相關，亦相關。舞蹈中我習得觀照身心感受、習得自律、習得去認知和體會自己的韌性與弱點、習得責任感、習得尊重自己和尊重他人，我常常想，就是因為有了這些，我才能找到自由。好比大自然，有節、有律，風吹草動、萬物換變仍不受限，自由、自如、自在。
# posted by Chao=Sabiy : 9:18 PM
Thursday, April 17, 2008
I remember when I was little, and was learning kinds of dances, the message I got from my teachers was not how to express myself, even Ballet. We were taught something like: how to achieve teachers' and your own goals in certain dances, how to find the balance in your body and to be in harmony with the music, and most important is, how to be better than yourself day after day, and be a good person, be helpful in your group. From the deep-rooted training of dances, especially Chinese and Ballet, I developed self-discipline. And as growing up, I have found that it is the disciplines (hidden in those movements I have to practice over and over again) I have earned in dance, eventually, gives me the freedom I long for!
# posted by Chao=Sabiy : 9:20 PM
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
I truly believe that individuals can make a difference in society. Since periods of change such as the present one come so rarely in human history, it is up to each of us to make the best use of our time to help create a happier world.
─Dalai Lama
# posted by Chao=Sabiy : 8:45 PM
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Thursday, April 03, 2008
前幾天與友談到難控制的 「心」。
我想，心，那麼好控制的話，就不叫心了!
舉例，我心早已回到臺灣，但現在隨時得將心分開來用、分開來觀照；思念，念念不斷，但與學校課業奮鬥、與實習時的 clients 接觸又得全身心投入。
是身心分離嗎？是，也不是。我想若能認知、體會心飛走了、飛回來了，心在這，心在那，都不算身心分離吧。
# posted by Chao=Sabiy : 10:45 PM
